Frustrated with myself.

Here I am at 40+3 and no baby. Yesterday I was upset when coming from the Dr's, I found out that although baby monkey was doing great, I was not progressing with labor. My doctor used the term 'unfavorable'. That is depressing to hear. They said they would call with induction dates.

Today they called. June 23 was the date chosen. I wasn't even asked to have an opinion. It was chosen for me. That's more than a week away. This is just so discouraging. I called my dad and ranted to him. Upset. I posted my feelings on facebook and twitter. Yet I still feel really really down about this. Like I don't know why--I guess because it's just taking so long and I'm anticipating it. I think some of it has to do with the unexpected realization that this could take so long. It's not so cut and dry as you would think. My first mommy lesson.


I have a few things planned to do over the next week to keep me busy:

• Make a rice sock
• Finish Scrapbooking
• Bake a birthday cake
• Make a belly cast
• Make a labor playlist
• Finish my garden (actually...care about my garden)
• Finish thank you cards

I hope that's enough things to keep me from not eating everything in sight while boring myself to death. I'm trying to look on the bright side of things--but I just need time to get over the dark side first I guess.

Hopefully he will come sooner and on his own--