Motherhood....revamped.

So...I've been on mommy mode for 4 weeks and 3 days now. That's how old my little chunk is! Things have gotten much better. I mean of course I still had a break down on Friday when he was gnawing my  nipples raw and screaming bloody murder pretty much all day, and I was freaking out every hour crying to my hubby at work to hurry home, while crying and being emotional for the rest of the night making a desicsion whether to keep him breastfed or switch to formula. Yeah...it was a bad day. But one day out of the week isn't too bad, right?

I decided to stick it out breastfeeding. Yes there's a ring around my nipple where he's pretty much 'sucked' the skin off literally. Yes-the joys of breastfeeding. Luckily after seeing 2 lactation consultants they adjusted my latch and pretty much said the baby has a tight grip when hes sucking. One of them recommended Genetian violet and piorbiotics (sp?) to help make sure the pain and soreness isn't because my thrush isn't still lingering. Nursing doesn't really hurt all that bad this evening so hopefully things are already working!

Talking to another breastfeeding mom today and she was saying that she really hated breastfeeding. She basically only does it because she knows 'breast is best'. But she seriously loathes it. I couldn't relate. Breastfeeding--I knew I wanted to do it. I knew I'd love it. Even back when I wrote this in back in January during my pregnancy--->

"Breast feeding is something I really really really want to do. I want to feel that bond and closeness (and pain) with my child in knowing that I am naturally equipped to provide my baby with food! That's got to be an awesome feeling."

This is true. I LOVE breastfeeding. Not because of all the great benefits, but mainly because knowing that I can soley provide nourishment for my child, is the most empowering feeling. He has went from 7 pounds 1 oz to 10 pounds and 1 oz in ONE month...because of my body. It's crazy. Plus--I love the face he makes when he's done. He sort of smacks his lips and close his eyes like "Yummm". He sucks in his lips and savors it. Then he falls into a milk coma and passes out.  It's hilarious.


Motherhood is getting easier. I'm getting to be a pro and night feedings and diaper changes. I look back now and wonder why I even freaked out in the beginning. It all seems sort of natural now. In fact--I'm totally on board with having another one in a few years! Shoot-- I'd do it again. Since my life is over anyway and isn't mines anymore--why not?!

I'm going back to work in 2 weeks...ahh I can't believe it. I have mixed feelings...but that's another entry.


Ciao.